It’s been so long since I last posted on here that I almost forgot I had a blog! I do apologise most profusely for my inactivity. I shall try to post at least once a month from now on, and continue with the writing quotes, as I know many of you enjoy those.
To summarise the past few months, it’s been a rollercoaster of planning, writing, Camp NaNoWriMo, health stuff, adulting, and everything in between.
I did complete Camp in July (Yey!). But the planning and plotting took longer than I hoped. The good news is that I am well and truly into writing my first ever first draft, and am about half way done with the first act.
It’s much harder, mentally, than I expected. If I’m not fighting my perfectionism and constant need to edit, I’m struggling with plot bunnies or new story ideas. Then there’s the moments of so much excitement that I can’t get my thoughts coherent enough to write them down. This is often swiftly followed by a crippling fear that I’ll never be good enough, which always gives way to the certainty that those few sentences I just wrote are THE WORST anyone has ever attempted. Then comes the whats-the-point-I’ll-never-be-good-enough days, where nothing but laying on the floor/bed/couch whilst staring at the ceiling will do.
I know I’m not alone in these feelings, but sometimes it definitely feels that way. I look at all of the writers I follow on Twitter and am so inspired by how organised they seem, and how much progress they’re making. Then I look at myself and my own efforts and feel like a fraud: my writing isn’t as good as theirs; I’m not as organised or motivated as they are; I can’t sit down and write a few thousand words a day, pushing out a draft every few months. I have no idea what I’m doing.
But I love it.
You see, as horrible as all of that is, and as bad as it feels in those moments, I always come back to it. Writing is my passion. It’s a way to escape, it’s a form of therapy, it pushes me to do and be better. I need it.
You don’t need to be published to be a writer. You don’t need to be any good to be a writer. You don’t even need to know what you’re doing to be a writer. You just need to write.
So that’s what I’m doing. Or trying to at least. Some days it goes better than others, but every word is a step closer to my goal of finishing a book.
I hope all of your writing endeavours are going well but if they’re not, that’s ok. You’re not alone. Make the most of your good days, and don’t worry too much about the bad. And I’ll try to do the same 🙂